I don’t know what I was expecting or why I applied.
All I know is I saw the ad among other job vacancies and forwarded my CV like thousands of Nigerians. It was listed on most job sites I visited in no specific category because Linda Ikeji, being the super woman that she is was hiring for 16 listed positions at the same time. No requirements or job descriptions were stated. 🙂
Sometimes I feel curiosity pushed me. The last thing I was expecting was an invitation but it came long after I had forgotten.
I was given a 17-hour notice. My schedule was tight.
“Should I go or should I not?” I kept asking myself. Then I went to play mind games with a few friends.
“Can you work for Linda Ikeji Media?”
“Can you work for Linda Ikeji Media?”
“Can you work for Linda Ikeji?”
Other responses were,
“I can. If they’ll pay at least 400k.”
“Omo I can oh but it’s going to look weird on my CV.”
“Yes. Any problem?”
Everyone’s path is different so I went. Basically, nothing would change in my life for that day if I waved the invitation and focused on my daily routine. On the other hand, I could meet someone that might change my life on my way out to LIM. I could get a good offer there. I could churn out a blog post in worst case scenario.
The security personnel were nice. You’d have to show proof of your invite before you are allowed in.
I was early. Other candidates kept trooping in long after I was seated. The staff there were mostly security and office cleaning staff.
Reception was filled within a short time so they kept others to sit in other offices. I can’t deny the little I saw of the building was impressive. I could see everyone that walked in. The boys, most of them looking like they were scouted from the blog’s comment section.
The ladies were different – Midi dresses, Brazilian hair & 4-inch heels. I think I was the only one girl who looked as carefree as an LIB comment section person.
Juliet Iwuno to be precise. Linda, take note.
They kept me for 3 hours, 4 minutes. A turnoff because I value my time and no updates were given while I waited. I tried to stay entertained by watching Linda’s brother walk around the premises. One or two persons looked recognisable. Her kid sister I think but man, I was bored to death.
Eventually, I was called. Two men made up the panel. The two men were to screen from a pool of candidates comprising of accountants, editors, engineers, customer care, IT professionals etc
I refuse to question the effectiveness of that.
“Tell me about yourself.” I did.
“Do you have a blog?”
“No. But I know a lot about setting up and running a blog, growing user base, social amplification etc” I said. I tried to give pointers to back my answer.
He asked what I did in addition to why I want to work there.
I spoke about what I do, my career objectives fused with what I assumed was the company vision (since they had none) and yes, what I admired in Linda.
Oh boy! What I said was rubbished and the man who headed the interview gave me a very condescending reply.
He said that is not a job! There’s nothing special about that. Anybody can do that. Using big grammar as if that is a job. “I’m sure you are one of those people who want to work here so they can boast to their friends, I work for Linda Ikeji. I’m working in Linda Ikeji media,” he said, mimicking a sissy’s manner of speaking.
“You want to work here because you’ve seen fine office abi. I hope you know this is a high pressured environment with targets.”
I’d rather not go into full details of the entire conversation.
I kept my calm even though all I wanted to utter was, “Oga, are you kidding me?”. I would have felt bad if I took the entire interview serious.
In the past couple of months, I have sat at the panel side in a number of interviews. Experience being among an interview panel and a ‘full-time job hunter’ in the past has taught me how to spot who is work-smart in a pool of 2’1 graduates, interpret body language, know tricky & test questions, know when an interviewer is intentionally provoking a candidate to test their tolerance level etc so I refuse to fault my performance this time around.
The other guy was cool. Tried to advocate for me once or twice but the interview ended as quickly as it began.
In no time I was out of the ‘fine office’ to happily resume my job the interviewer said was not a job.